Dr. Metablog

Dr. Metablog is the nom de blague of Vivian de St. Vrain, the pen name of a resident of the mountain west who writes about language, books, politics, or whatever else comes to mind. Under the name Otto Onions (Oh NIGH uns), Vivian de St. Vrain is the author of “The Big Book of False Etymologies” (Oxford, 1978) and, writing as Amber Feldhammer, is editor of the classic anthology of confessional poetry, “My Underwear” (Virago, 1997).

We've named our GPS navigatrix,  who gives instruction with a schoolmarmish London accent, Dorcas (which is, along with Prunella, one of my very favorite English given — or as they call them,"Christian"– names).  Dorcas has proved to be, on the whole, a reliable friend. She had a little trouble in Cincinnati, where, it turns out, there are two entirely distinct 225 Hill Terrace addresses. She took us to the wrong one — but I confess that in this case the error can fairly be traced to information-inputter, Dr. M. himself.

Dorcas also had a royal hissy fit when we had to detour onto a single-lane-on-the-other-side-of the-road somewhere in Ohio — she "recalculated" twenty or thirty times, until I had to temporarily stop her mouth.   It could only be my imagination, but I thought I detected a trace of exasperation in her tone of voice. 

Despite these failings, the Dorcster is a dream at finding her way around unfamiliar towns. No longer will I have to stop at gas stations for incomprehensible advice about how to get back on the highway.  I just call on Dorcas and I've got a friend, oh yeah, I've got a friend.   

3 responses to “Travels with Dorcas”

  1. mindy goldstein Avatar
    mindy goldstein

    hello again vivian-I sure hope we stay connected. I must congratulate you on your GPS! It will help empower you alot.
    Unfortunately, last week I had mine stolen from the trunk of my car so I am back to paper and pencil of writing down to:directions and From:directions…dont worry I plan on getting another very soon-My GPS was named Gigi-(after my family last name since my family gave it to me!
    I still get way lost with it-BUT I know I will be able to eventually get back home…its a blessing isnt it? Fondly, Mindy G

  2. I have read your articles and comments. I haven’t heard anyone complain about sitting in their house and not knowing where they are in relation to the street unless they look out the window.
    I have a GPS that is great unless it gets to a place where it looses the satellite. I am so afraid that one night my GPS will fail me and I don’t know what I will do.

  3. I am living in a townhouse (3 mos now ) and I cannot understand how the upstairs is connected to the downstairs in terms of direction. For example,when I go upstairs how is it that the master bedroom faces the front and not the back of the place ? I’ve tried unsuccessfully to walk out this very complex problem and just don’t get it.😁 Finding this website has made my day. Thanks to everyone 😘

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