Dr. Metablog

Dr. Metablog is the nom de blague of Vivian de St. Vrain, the pen name of a resident of the mountain west who writes about language, books, politics, or whatever else comes to mind. Under the name Otto Onions (Oh NIGH uns), Vivian de St. Vrain is the author of “The Big Book of False Etymologies” (Oxford, 1978) and, writing as Amber Feldhammer, is editor of the classic anthology of confessional poetry, “My Underwear” (Virago, 1997).

February 2021

  • (This entry is written for my grandchildren and any subsequent descendants, should there by any, who might like to know how and where their brain anomalies originated. Whether they will revere or curse me for what I've bequeathed them, I'll never know. Just as well. The further they are removed from me, the less they…

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  • A coverlet is not a small cover. The "let" is not a diminutive — it's let as in copire lectum (L) or "cuivre lit" (Fr).  A bedcover. Neither a blanket nor a bedspread, but both — a decorative but warm item of bedclothes. "Jacquard" refers to the Jacquard attachment, which was a series of punchcards…

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  • From August 1976 to summer 1977, we lived at this odd, modernistic house at 1 Leycroft Close in Canterbury, Kent. The small tree, something in the prunus line, wasn't there at the time so the house was more visible. The house wasn't suitable for a family of five, but we made it work, barely. Two…

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  • Until this last week, when I read Patrik Svensson's Book of Eels (2019), I had never encountered either of these lovely and mysterious adjectives. I'm delighted to add "anadromous" and "catadromous," along with their cousin "diadromous" to my vocabulary, though when I'll be able to drop any of these words into my quotidian or even…

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  • In September of 2014 I wrote about a horrible tragedy that is commemorated in our cemetery — the old West Bradford cemetery on Hackett Hill Road. Inasmuch as I've lived adjacent to it these last 52 years, I feel a strange proprietary connection to the people it houses. I've wandered in it, tended it, studied…

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  • What an excellent invention! Imagine life without the blanket. At night, we'd still be keeping warm with hay and leaves. Yeesh, defective insulation. Hay and hayseeds in our noses and mouths. Leaves, leaflets, thick main ribs and petioles poking and imprinting our skin. Constant renewal problems: "Have remembered to fetch the hay for tonight yet?"…

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  • I was on a rubber raft in the middle of an ocean.  Three or four swordfish surrounded me. They were about to spear my raft and drown me — because they wanted my pension. I wondered how I was to transfer my wealth to them — could they take it out in small, edible fish?…

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  • The Tampa Bay Devil Rays now claim that they won the 2020 World Series against the Dodgers — even though most of us saw the Dodgers win by a margin of 4 games to 2.  The Rays claim that in Game 5, two runs scored by Tampa Bay were nefariously credited to the Dodgers. The…

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