Dr. Metablog

Dr. Metablog is the nom de blague of Vivian de St. Vrain, the pen name of a resident of the mountain west who writes about language, books, politics, or whatever else comes to mind. Under the name Otto Onions (Oh NIGH uns), Vivian de St. Vrain is the author of “The Big Book of False Etymologies” (Oxford, 1978) and, writing as Amber Feldhammer, is editor of the classic anthology of confessional poetry, “My Underwear” (Virago, 1997).

A Dream of Swordfish

I was on a rubber raft in the middle of an ocean.  Three or four swordfish surrounded me. They were about to spear my raft and drown me — because they wanted my pension.

I wondered how I was to transfer my wealth to them — could they take it out in small, edible fish?

And so my dreamatorium continues to exceed expectations.

[February 13.  Still another "I am lost" dream, but this one with an unusual feature. I am at a subway kiosk, trying to get a token or change for a $20 bill so I can board the train, and the attendant says to me, "do you want your change in money or in spaghetti?" Honest to Pete, that's what she said. I say, of course, "I'll have it in money, please," but nevertheless she hands me a pound of dry spaghetti, wrapped in cellophane or plastic, but already falling apart. I walk away with the pound of spaghetti and try to get rid of it by placing it on a window ledge, but a passer-by retrieves it and hands it back to me. "You forgot your spaghetti," he says. Soon after I find a garbage can and stow the spaghetti, and the dream continues in predictable channels.

I think the question, "Do you want your change in money or in spaghetti?" is one of the best sentences my dreamatorium has ever generated.]

Leave a Reply

RECENT POSTS


ARCHIVE


Discover more from Dr. Metablog

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading